Tag Archives: misunderstandings

Perspective Versus Perception

CatAndMirror111 Perception

Have you ever felt like you really had nothing to offer? Everyone around you seems to be rocking their world and you can’t even rock your way into a better job or any job, a better car, or a nicer place to live.

You say to yourself, “This is just my lot in life and I just have to learn to live with it. For many, to many, years this was my perspective on life.

I would tell myself there are the haves and the have-nots and that is just the way life is. I saw myself as unimportant in the grand scheme of life. Having an average appearance with straight brown hair, light brown eyes,  painfully shy and insecure, nope, nothing exceptional about me.

Living in a dysfunctional family, in a rented house, wearing outdated clothes from Sally’s Boutique and riding in an old beat up car. I wasn’t exactly a sought after individual by my peers. Oh I made a few friends and did fair in school but there were no extra curricular activities (ECAs) other than chorus for a year in Jr high (I think it was required?). So I found my own ECA’s. with others in my own league, the-down-and-outers league. (Not a reflection on the person of my friends, just my perception of where we all were in life at the time.) One thing I did like was dancing and was told I was pretty good at it by many. I had a brief glimmer of hope that I might become a professional choreographer, but alas, I was told later in my teen years that my legs were to short to be a professional dancer. Chalk it off as another flaw!

My perception through all of these experiences was that I didn’t have anything of value to offer therefore could expect little in the way of return or success. This brought about years of just settling for less than God’s best. And also became a good excuse for not trying to do better. Yup, that’s where it takes you!

You see our perception, how we see ourselves and our abilities, has a definite effect on our perspective, the outcome that we expect. And the outcome we expect will, more than likely be the outcome we get.

If we perceive ourselves as victims, we will expect to be a victimized by others so we don’t trust.

If I perceive ourselves as  failures we don’t expect to succeed therefore we don’t try.

If we perceive there is no way out of a relationship, a financial crisis, or a struggle with self control  in some area then we expect nothing will change and we give up, we lose hope.

a different perspective

In the Bible we see a perfect example of how perspective affects perception and visa-versa. God promised Abraham that He would give his offspring the land of Canaan in Genesis 12:7, 17:1-8 and again reminded Moses and the Israelites of His promise in Exodus 3:7-8.

But when the time came to prepare to enter the promised land the twelve members of the reconnaissance team, sent out by Moses to scope out the land, came back with conflicting recommendations. Oh, they all agreed it was, for sure, a land that “flowed with milk and honey” and they even brought back a sample of the beautiful fruit that was there. But ten of the twelve quickly followed up with, “However  (a fancier word for but), the people who dwell in the land are strong, and the cities are fortified and very large…….we seemed to ourselves like grasshoppers, and so we seemed to them.” God said He would give them the land but they let fear take control and keep them from claiming the promise.

Yet two of the twelve were ready to take the giants on! These two, Joshua and Caleb, saw their God as much bigger than those they saw in the land, God said that He was going to give them the land and they believed He would do just that. Most will remember the name of the two, but who remembers the name of the other ten?

The difference in the two reports was not accuracy in what all twelve saw but in their perception of how they saw it in light of their own understanding. The two believing their God could and would keep His promise trusted Him with the difficulties they might face. The ten could only see defeat, forgetting God’s promises.

The good news is that our perspective in turn can also change our perception and a changed perception and perspective can change our life, our world! When we can look at Scripture and study it we begin to see how God sees us and that is a real game changer!

We see that God sees potential in us and we begin to believe things can change.

We understand “in the world we will have trouble” but also are promised that God has overcome the world and will be with us we believe we can have courage to change.

We begin to see in, hind-site, how God has been working behind the scenes in our lives and can believe His promise that He will never leave us or forsake us and we can know He will pick us up when we fall. (Hebrews 13:5-6)

We can even believe that we “can do all things through Christ who is our strength”, so we step out in faith and try. (Philippians 4:23)

If we perceive God is good, and He is, and we believe He keeps His promises, and He does, then we can have faith and believe that He will. For we know that God can do all things; no plan of His can be thwarted (Job 42:2).

“For nothing is impossible for God.” (Luke 1:37)

Yes, we remember the rejection and pain we have experienced at the hands of others or as a result of our own choices in life, but we can believe God loves us, forgives us and promises to restores us, and He does.

Steven Furtick writes in his book: Crash the Chatterbox – Hearing God’s Voice Above All the Others: “The Enemy can’t do a thing to diminish God’s promises – that ability is decidedly beyond the limits of his power. So instead he lures you into places where your perspective of God’s promises will be diminished.”

For Adam and Eve it was near a the tree of life, the very tree God had forbidden them to eat from.  (It’s never a good idea to get that close to forbidden fruit!) Genesis 3:1-7

For the ten spies it was a land of giants. (There are giants in every land.) (Numbers 13:31-33)

For  Elijah it was seclusion in a cave. (We can’t hide from God)(1 Kings 19:1-14)

Where has he been luring you? Has the Enemy taken you places in your own head or heart that are altering your perception of who God is and who you are in Him?

Are you close to forbidden fruit, fearing the giants, or hiding from God in seclusion?

Go to the quiet place and listen for God’s voice. Read His Word and search out His promises. Read about how much He loves you and longs to help you become all He has for you to be. Tell him about your fears, insecurities, anxieties.

He is waiting for you, even pursuing you. In all these things He is able to bring you into a better place, for your good and His glory!

 

 

 

 

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Filed under character study, faith stages, forgiveness, peace, Promises, self-examination, Weary encouragement hope

Are We Counting What Really Counts

church stats 2

For those of us that attend church on a regular basis or even those who are occasional attenders we probably all remember seeing one of the “Attendance and Offering Registers” hanging in a prominent place on the wall for everyone to see.

I often wondered just what purpose they served and have come to the conclusion that this information served two purposes depending on whether the current tally was a plus or a minus: 1. To encourage and/or  2. To motivate.

Now please don’t get all fired up and send me nasty-grams!

As one who has been a part of a church leadership team I do understand the importance and purpose of having attendance records and keeping track of finances. They both give leadership a measurable picture of where the church is headed and how to proceed. It helps to know how to plan to meet the needs of ministry in the most productive way  so that we honor God with the resources He supplies. I also understand that it’s good to have that same information available to the congregation to encourage them and to make them aware of where we are in our growth and finances, or lack of, and for financial accountability.

However what I don’t understand is why we don’t have a “Soul Register”? Isn’t our first priority to see souls come to Christ; to find salvation? And isn’t that the greatest measure of where we are spiritually and our success as the local body of believers?   Yet we don’t put up the stats for the number of souls saved as a result of ministry and sharing our faith, the Gospel.

It has been said by many in the leadership of the church that “It’s not about numbers, it’s about souls.” and I agree with that, however it is about the number of souls being saved.

“The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9

So why are they not counted on our church’s public registers? I can’t think of anything that should motivate  us more. Maybe we need to see those numbers and just maybe it would motivate us to step out in faith and share the message of salvation more often. God will provide the opportunities in our ministries in the church and individually, it is up to us to take advantage of them, and may it begin with “me”.

What do you think your church’s “Soul Register” would look like if you had one?

There is a register in heaven of all the souls saved and the angels rejoice over each and every one that comes to Christ, shouldn’t we?

 

 

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Where’s Your Trigger Set?

As the wife of a Master Gunsmith I have found there is much to learn about life from the care and repair of firearms and their ability to help or harm. My husband is retired now but still does some “trigger work” every year for a couple of long time customers. These customers keep coming back because they want someone with experience and the right tools needed to keep the trigger settings within a legal and safe margin.

If the trigger pull is to light (to touchy) the gun can go off prematurely without warning, randomly hitting whatever is in its path. If the trigger pull is to heavy (harder to pull) there is a tendency to pull away from your target and hit what is not intended, missing the mark completely. Adjustments are made by filing and/or adjusting tensions to get just the right trigger set point. Each firearm may have a different set point when it comes from the manufacturer that is within what is considered to be the legal and safe range. Set points may need to be changed in order to accommodate an individuals stature, strength, and the purpose for which the firearm is used, always keeping in mind the legal and safe range.

Just as a trigger on a firearm can be dangerous if it isn’t evaluated and adjusted from time to time, in order to respond appropriately to the pressure being exerted on it, we too have a point where situations, circumstances, and others can “trip our trigger” (pun intended). Where our trigger is set can make the difference in whether or not we miss or hit our mark, whether we harm or help as we fire off our response.

The place we see this analogy play out most often today is in the realm of  social media. With the rapidly increasing social media available, every thought, opinion, and challenge is out there for all to respond to and with many of the opinions and responses having little or no filter. Because there is no personal contact, personal responsibility or immediate repercussions to the response or comment posted, the comments are often shot from the hip. When an opinion or comment hits a nerve we are often quick to fire off our own responses and/or comments, defending or rebuking without any thought that they may consequently ricochet and harm an innocent bystander. But on the other hand we may delay our making positive comments or fail to consider not responding at all in order to diffuse a conversation gone rogue.

So where is your trigger set?

Does your trigger need to be reset?

Is it to touchy? Or is there too much delay? Either way you could be missing the mark and end up needing damage control!

Our set points may need to be changed in order to accommodate our individual natures, strengths or weaknesses, and the purpose of our response, always keeping in mind the safe and effective range.

So what are we to do?

How do we find the experience and the right tools to reset our “trigger point”?

Of course a master gunsmith won’t be able to do the job, but on the other hand we have a Master Creator who made us and He knows just where our triggers are set and has given us the tools to adjust them and maintain them at that safe and effective level that will enable us to fulfill His purpose. God has even given us the instruction book, His own word, on keeping that set point in line with His will, His target for building His kingdom here on earth in a positive and effective way. He will guide us, file down our rough spots, and tighten or loosen the tensions to adjust the response time to where it needs to be.

He gives much attention to instructing us to “be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:9) , to have “soundness in our speech that cannot be condemned” (Titus 2:8), and to “Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.” (Colossians 4:6) These are just a few of our instructions regarding our speech, whether spoken or written.

In the final analysis are we going regularly to the Master to assure our trigger point is set where it needs to be or are we just letting emotions and others determine our set point? Is our aim to be right or to live the righteous life that God desires? Do we want to show how much we know or how much we care, to be grumpy or gracious?

To conclude I leave you with a quote from  King Solomon’s practical words for living in the Proverbs:

“A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”  Proverbs 25:11

Let your words be like “apples of gold” and you will find the “settings of silver” that the Lord wants to reveal in and through you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Filed under communication, Kindness, peace, Peaceful, responsibility

To Whomever May Relate

 

communications

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COMMUNICATION


To Whomever May Relate

Errors in communication have been the source of many a problem for centuries. At times they have caused down-right disasters. But in the Bird household they are often just a source of irritation, inconvenience, and sometimes laughter. And they often produce stories that are passed down from generation to generation.

The following conversations show just a small sample of the result of mis-communication. All of the incidents are true, but names have been changed to protect the not-so-innocent.

Ice Cubes

MOM – (all set for a cold drink on a hot day and now agitated)”Who took the last ice cubes and didn’t replenish them?”

SALLY (teen age daughter, seemingly oblivious to Mom’s agitation) – “I did.”

MOM – ( more agitated) Why didn’t you put the ice cube trays back in the freezer to make more?

SALLY – (seriously trying to defend herself) “Because they were empty and you told us not to put them back in the freezer empty.”

??????

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Out of the mouths of Babes

After a discussion where my husband and I were complaining about paying taxes our daughter, a kindergartner at the time, asked what happens if you don’t pay the taxes? We responded, they will take away our house.

SUNDAY SCHOOL TEACHER – “Does anyone have any prayer requests today?”

NANCY – “I do, if we don’t pay our taxes they are going to take our house away from us.”

After the service: We were approached by the Pastor.

PASTOR – (Very concerned)”We would like to offer some assistance to help you financially.”

ME – (very confused) “Well things have been tight but we are ok, really.”

PASTOR – (Very convinced) “I know it is hard to accept help but your daughter shared the concern that you can’t pay your taxes and may lose your home with her Sunday School teacher.”

I tried to explain but I’m not sure I ever really convinced him it was a mistake?

???????

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He Said, She Heard – She Said, He Heard

ME – (to spouse) “I need your help getting the garage cleaned today, winter is coming and we need to be able to out the car in.”

SPOUSE – “We can do that tomorrow.”

ME – “If we don’t do it today it won’t get done.”

SPOUSE – “Remind me tomorrow.”

Next day:

ME – “Don’t forget we are cleaning the garage today.”

SPOUSE – “I know, you don’t have to keep reminding me.”

???????

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BEST OF ALL! Telling on myself.

SPOUSE – (out of town/on the phone) “Don’t forget to check the oil in the car.”

ME – “I don’t know how to check the oil in the car!”

SPOUSE – “You just pull the dip stick out, wipe it off, put it back in and then pull it back out and look to see how many marks the oil is below the full line. Then put that many quarts in using the spout that is by the oil.”

ME – “What is a dip stick?”

SPOUSE – Hesitates, then explains where it is and what it looks like.

ME – (later in the day on the phone to spouse) “Something is really wrong with the car.”

SPOUSE- “Why? Did you put the oil in?”

ME – “Yes, but it wasn’t as easy as you said. The spout you told me to use was way to big and some of the oil spilled. It wouldn’t hold the quart of oil the stick said it needed. And when I started it to go to the store it started smoking under the hood terrible. Something must be wrong with it.”

SPOUSE – “Have Joe (our mechanic) look at it.”

JOE – “There is oil all over the motor.”

ME – “I know, the oil spout thing was to big for the opening where the oil goes and some spilled.”

JOE – “Which opening did you use?”

ME – “Well the one where the dip stick is. That’s where the oil is, duh!”

JOE – laughing uncontrollably

“Was it something I said??????”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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